The SheldonPenny Paradox
by Maddy46
Summary: A bunch of drabbles, one-shots and short stories about Sheldon and Penny.
1. Arguing with Sheldon

**A/N: Okay, nothing really to say here, except that this one is more of a Shenny drabble, though not really romantic. :P **

PPOV

I would never admit it, but secretly, I enjoyed arguing with Sheldon. I don't know why, but it brings some kind of joy for me to make him twitch with annoyance and retaliate somehow in some clever way. The rest of the guys "knuckled under". They never stood up for themselves, so I think it came as a surprise to Sheldon when I, a waitress/actress, finally gave him a run for his money, and, call me crazy, I think he enjoys it too. Finally! Someone who would give him even a tiny challenge!

… Yeah, I enjoy arguing with Sheldon.

**A/N: Hope you like it! Remember, R&R! :D**


	2. If Only

AN- As requested, this one is not a drabble, (drabbles are 100 words exactly) it's a one-shot, though if it gets lots of reviews, I might make it a separate fanfic.

PPOV

If only that insane, psychotic, whack-a-doodle nerd had never spoken to me. Well, I can't blame it on him, Leonard was the one who said hi first, but he didn't need to introduce me to Sheldon. Then again, I probably still would've spoken to him, and our friendship would still be like this.

If only he wasn't so insane, psychotic, whack-a-doodle-y or nerdy. If he was normal, he wouldn't feel the need to be so obsessive, or correct me when I made a mistake, or take our teasing to the next level.

If only I didn't like that. It might seem weird, but I consider Sheldon my best friend, though very closely followed by Leonard. Leonard tries too hard. He always insists on helping me, or tries to talk to me every time I see him. He tries WAY too hard. Sheldon, on the other hand, just lives by his own rules, and doesn't let anyone get in his way. I like that. He gives me challenges that always frustrate me, which leads to an argument, which leads to us making up, which leads to a stronger friendship. He helps me, even if it's inconvenient for him, or frustrates him, which leads to an argument, which leads to me telling him its okay, which leads to another argument. He's insane, psychotic, a whack-a-doodle, and a nerd, but deep down, he's sensitive and caring. Now that's not to say he shows it, but I can sense it.

If only I knew how he felt, and how I feel.

AN- Now I know it's short, but I think it's sweet, and after writing this, I think I might extend it. Maybe another chapter in Sheldon's point of view (how challenging), and we'll see where it goes from there.

Thanks! 3

Read and Review! If you don't review, then how do I know what you think/want? ;)


	3. If Only 2

AN-After a few more reviews, I have decided to continue If Only for at least one more chapter. This one is in Sheldon's point of view. Hopefully I can manage it! :P

A big thank you to stock2007 and La Apricot! Without you, this chapter may never have been written! 3

SPOV

If only my infuriating room-mate and best friend had never had spoken to her! My life would still be as it always had been. No community college graduate always walking into my apartment without waiting for so much as a "permission granted" to enter. No-one to sit in my spot, touch my food or insult me constantly, even if I do respond with an obviously more witty and impertinent insult. Of course, I can't blame it all on Leonard. Penny was the one who broke up with her tall, egotistical boyfriend. It's all Penny's fault, like always.

If only she wasn't so attractive. Leonard wouldn't have ever considered talking to her. I don't need to have an IQ of 187 to know that. My life would have a sense of normality. Although upon thinking about it, I can no longer clearly imagine my life without Penny. There is no-one else I trust more than Penny, not even Leonard. Leonard has deceived me on more than one occasion, ruining my credibility, career and dignity, whereas Penny has insulted me, touched my food, sat in my spot, and, most importantly, ruined laundry night. A night we share together. But what have I done to her? I broke into her house (if it can be called breaking in if she gave us the key) and cleaned it; I have insulted her and thrown her clothes onto a telephone wire. If only she didn't possess so much confidence. She mightn't be able to irritate me so much. If only I didn't enjoy a challenge.

If only she wasn't a waitress. I wouldn't have to see her as often. My Tuesday nights would be spent at Big Boy, and I wouldn't have to first navigate through a labyrinth of social nonsense before eating. But I like the bacon cheeseburger Penny brings me every Tuesday evening. If Penny wasn't the one to bring it to me, the first thing I would ask would be "where is Penny?" I realise I have come to depend on Penny, just as much as everyone depends on me.

If only I didn't think of her as my best friend. I would never admit it, but she is. Leonard avoids me when I am sick, as does Penny, but when I am, I ask her to sing Soft Kitty, a song only my mother would ever sing to me, and she does. She has even asked me to sing it to her once, and I did, because it is part of the social contract. She asks me a question, and I must respond.

If only I knew how she feels… and of course I know how I feel. Penny is one of the people I trust most in the world, and my best friend.

AN-Phew! That one was quite difficult to write, I actually started rambling for a bit there. However, it's the longest one I've written, and although it's not as sweet as Penny's, I think it's more humorous.

Also, on the way is a new fanfic (Leonard and Penny this time)so if anyone wants to help with that, PM me and we can co-write if you like the idea (which I will tell you if you PM me, :P)

Remember to R&R!

(¯`•.•´¯) (¯`•.•´¯)

º `•.¸.•´ º .¸¸.•´¯`


	4. The UpsideDown Underestimation

Disclaimer- (I know, I haven't had this at the start of the other ones but here t is) I don't own Big Bang Theory.

LPOV

"So Sheldon and Penny have a strong relationship. Doesn't mean anything's going to happen, I mean its Sheldon, for crying out loud!" God, Raj and Howard are frustrating.

"Yes, but after spending so much time with Penny, Sheldon might miraculously change and actually become normal, therefore feeling attraction to the one woman all of us are attracted to. And with their already strong friendship, he has more of a chance than any of us." Howard rambled in that tone of his. The how-do-you-like-that tone he uses so frequently. Raj whispered in Howard's ear. Sheldon and Penny were playing age of Conan and, obviously, he didn't want Penny hearing him. We were all talking in hushed tones to avoid them hearing us. Of course, with Sheldon's Vulcan hearing, we were lucky he was wearing his headset and was completely focused on the game, otherwise we would've been screwed.

"Good point," Howard whispered to Raj, "don't forget that Raj already hasn't got a shot, every time I talk to her, she punches me, and you've crashed and burned so many times I lost count. "

"Wow, thanks." I rolled my eyes.

"That's what we're here for," Howard commented. I rolled my eyes. "The point is that we have a major problem here. The world has turned upside-down if Sheldon has a shot with Penny!"

"Sheldon doesn't have shot with Penny, they're just friends." I reached for my drink. Raj and Howard are delusional, I thought.

"How many times have you underestimated Sheldon? Hm?" Howard asked. I thought about that for a second. "Oh dear lord, Sheldon has a shot with Penny!" it took all of my restraint not to shout.

The next night was much the same, Penny and Sheldon were playing Age of Conan and all I could do was watch with new eyes. It felt like tiny pieces of me were breaking away, every time I saw him "laugh" at one of her jokes, or every time she turned to him for help, and he took her laptop and tapped away at the keyboard. I glared at Howard and Raj. If it weren't for them, I would still have strong feelings for Penny, and I wouldn't be jealous of the one person I never thought I'd feel jealous of. Raj noticed my glaring, and whispered in Howard's ear, who then turned to me. He leaned forward. "Jealous?" he asked. When I didn't respond, he took it as a yes. "Listen, if it's any consolation, this is not how I felt when you dated Penny. Also, I now lots of bars where all the ladies hang out. Come on, I'll take you."

"No thanks Howard. I don't think I'll ever go to a bar with you again." We were whispering again. Raj whispered in his ear again. Speaking to Raj, he said,

"I don't know why he doesn't want to go to a bar, okay. Not everyone wants to be a wingman like you." Turning back to me, he said "the point is, you just have to get over her. Everyone knows you don't stand a chance, and with Sheldon's obvious lack of muscle, normality and interest in dating, there's just less of a chance, because you know him."  
"Never stopped you," I pointed out.

"Because I don't live with the guy." The conversation stopped there, and I was still forced to watch Penny, the girl of my dreams, and Sheldon, the guy from my nightmares, talk to each other and help each other like old pals. My relationship with Penny wasn't so easy, I realised. Whenever I see her, I freeze up and say something stupid. Maybe Sheldon knows more about girls then I do, but he doesn't realise it. Or maybe he just knows more about Penny than I do. It wouldn't surprise me. He and Penny spend a lot of time together, whereas I never made the time for her. How could I be so stupid? Obviously I'd never had a shot with her, because I never put in an effort!

"Actually, I think you did the opposite. You put in too much effort. Sheldon just acts naturally." Howard said. I must've spoken aloud. I didn't react, well, at least I hoped I didn't. Maybe Howard's smarter than me… and if that's true, the world really has turned upside-down.

AN-So how was it? I thought I'd try something different and write a Shenny story from Leonard's point of view. Tell me what you think of it!

This fanfic (The PennySheldon Paradox) is getting heaps of hits and visitors, so thank you everyone!

Also, remember, PM if you want to co-write the Leonard/Penny story with me. Otherwise I'll just try it by myself.


	5. The Naming Reassurance

**AN-Thought I'd try another one from Sheldon's point of view, since I had a lot of fun writing the last one, also, everyone keeps telling me how much like Sheldon I am, :P Hopefully, this one will be longer, and I'll keep writing until it is, so I apologize in advance if I ramble on for a while. **

**Disclaimer-I don't own Big Bang Theory… but I wish. :P**

SPOV

Walking to Marie's room, I smiled. Penny was walking beside me, and my beautiful daughter was falling asleep in my arms. The two people, who I loved most in this world, were right next to me, and, even though I don't believe in the hokum we call luck, I felt lucky. For all I cared, the whole of Texas could be underwater and I wouldn't care. Granted, I wouldn't care anyway, but my point was obvious. Penny opened the door for me, and I walked into Marie's room. It wasn't decorated like a nursery, it was a normal room, however, it did feature some "baby" items, such as the crib, the toy box, and the books. This was because I didn't think our daughter should be treated as a baby, but a person. "If she is treated as a baby, how will she develop into a genius?" Those were my exact words to Penny; but she disagreed. "She shouldn't be treated like a genius, any differently to other babies, just because her father is a whack-a-doodle," she said. So in the end, we agreed on a compromise. She would have the baby books, the toys, the crib, but she would be treated like a human too.

I kissed Marie on the forehead, and handed her to Penny. She kissed her too, and, together, we gently put her in the crib. She was already asleep, with her thumb in her mouth. I bent over and pulled it out, gently, of course, but Penny was staring at me with a look of disbelief. I walked out of the room, and Penny followed. "Why Sheldon? She's a baby! It's natural!" she whispered.  
"Because, if I stop it now, she won't do it in the future, therefore eliminating the need for us to 'phase it out' of her after years of the habit. Everyone knows it's easier to break a habit earlier on," I whispered back. "Yeah, remind me to break that habit of yours," she said.  
"Sarcasm?" I asked.  
"Only slightly," she said.  
"Was that sarcasm?" I asked again.  
"No Sheldon."  
"Sarcasm?"  
"Sheldon!" she almost yelled, and I stopped, "thank you,' she sighed. Even after all these years, we still bicker like before. As we walked to our room, I asked "Penny… what habit?"  
"The annoying one you've had since we met. Where you reply to everything I say with that 'how-could-you-possibly-not-know-that' tone."  
"Oh…" I still didn't understand, but I've learnt from experience to just let it go.

That night, I dreamt of the day Marie was born…

_MEMORY_

"_It's a girl," the nurse said. Penny was lying on the bed, practically asleep, she smiled at me.  
"Hear that Shelly? A girl." I knew what she meant. I had wanted a girl, as a boy would've been a lot harder to bring up, for me. The nurse had cleaned my baby daughter up and wrapped her in a pink blanket. I almost rolled my eyes. I still fail to understand why pink is associated with girls. It is a colour, and colours do not have minds, and therefore cannot choose to be associated with a gender, however, that moment was almost perfect. The nurse brought the tiny human being over to me, but I shook my head. "Penny should hold her first," I pointed out, but Penny weakly shook her head. She was very tired, it was nearly 11:00 at night, and even I was feeling tired, but I had done nothing that night. So I turned back to the nurse, "I don't know how," I said, and I swear I heard Penny laugh. The nurse taught me how to hold her, and I managed it. The doctors were moving Penny into another room to recover, and I slowly followed, still holding my baby. "Marie," I whispered, "Marie Jade," as I sat next to Penny in the new room. "Cooper," she whispered back, "Marie Jade Cooper." And that was the perfect moment._

_MEMORY ENDED_

When I woke up the next morning, Penny asked me a question while we stood outside Marie's room. "Shelly, do you remember why we named her Marie?" It amazes me how she still can't remember this.  
"We named her Marie, because that was Madam Curie's name," I whispered.  
"Oh. What about Jade?" she asked.  
"We gave her the second name Jade because that's the colour I see when I look into your eyes," I whispered again. "So you named her then. Not me." It wasn't a question, I realised.  
"No. That's not true. You named her. Madam Curie was an amazing woman, but not as amazing as you. Jade is the colour of your eyes, and, well, you gave her her last name," I said as I hugged her. I saw Penny smile. "I love you Sheldon Lee Cooper," she said.  
"I love you to Penny," I said back, and I meant it. It was the second perfect moment.

**AN- How was it? Personally, I think this is the most romantic one so far, but it wasn't really Sheldon, If you know what I mean. At least it was longer, hope you liked it! **

**Remember to review! :P**


	6. The Food Fight Explanation

**Disclaimer- I don't own Big Bang Theory. If I did, Sheldon and Penny would be together! :P**

PPOV

It was my day off, and I decided to do some cooking. I just never had time for it anymore and I couldn't afford to keep eating take-out with the guys. Flicking through a recipe book, nothing caught my eye, so I went on to another. I must've gone through at least four books when I gave up. I'd just have to keep eating take-out until I could find a good recipe. "At this rate, I'm not going to make it through the next month," I sighed.

There were three knocks at the door "Penny," came that voice I had come to secretly love, but I just wasn't in the mood right now. Three knocks, "Penny," and three more, "Penny." I opened the door, "What do you want, Sheldon?" I asked impatiently. His face flinched slightly, and I immediately felt guilty. "I came over here to see how your day off was going," he said.

"Really?" I asked skeptically, I had the feeling I was about to get roped in to something, but Sheldon seemed surprised by my question, "Penny, why would I come over here and then ask you a question I didn't mean to ask?"

"I don't know, but whenever you come over here, it's usually to get me to do something for you," I said warily, "but, to answer your question, mot the best Sheldon. It turns out I have no interesting recipes." "Well, I'm sure that's not true, cooking shows personality. On the other hand maybe you're spot-on," he said. It took me a moment to realise what he was implying. He seemed rather pleased with himself, so I figured I'd go along with his game. "Well, Sheldon, since you're over here, I assume you don't need to go to work today?"

"That would be correct," he replied.

"Well then how would you like to come in and cook something from my recipe books?" He was taken aback, but I knew him, he wouldn't turn down a challenge, so he agreed. When he came in, he turned and looked at me. "Penny, since you clearly aren't capable of cooking a meal by yourself, would you like me to help you?" Now I was the one who was taken aback.

"You want to help me?" I asked.

"Penny, since you claim you and I are friends, I believe part of that entails that I sometimes do 'favours' for you."

"So you want to help me cook something?"

"Yes, that's what I just said, is it not?" God, he frustrates me, but since he was offering,

"Okay Sheldon, you may help me cook a meal." He picked up one of my discarded recipe books and checked the index. "Okay, this looks promising, Vegetable and Noodle Stir-fry," he said as he turned to the page. He took a quick look at the ingredients list, put the book down nd starting looking through my fridge. I walked over to the book and read the recipe. It didn't look half bad, and it was perfect for using up left over vegetables, which saved me money. I looked up, Sheldon had already collected half of the ingredients. I looked back down, trying to familiarize myself with the recipe.

_Vegetable an Noodle Stir-fry_

_Ingredients_

_1 spring onion_

_1 piece of celery_

_1 floret of broccioli_

_2 tbs bean shoots_

_1 tbs hoisin sauce_

_1 carrot_

_¼ capsicum_

_1 mushroom_

_50g noodles – rice or hokkien_

_1 tbs oil_

_Method_

_Prepare all vegetables_

_Prepare noodles (if using rice noodles place in bowl, cover with hot water and leave to soak for a few minutes)._

_Heat oil in a wok or fry pan. Test heat._

_Place onion, carrot, broccoli and capsicum into pan and stir-fry for 3-4 minutes._

_Add bean shoots and sauce and stir until all is covered._

_Drain noodles, roughly shop and add to vegetables, mix well._

_Serve_

It seemed easy enough, and delicious. Sheldon had gotten everything. "Penny," he started,"you don'thave mushrooms or bean sprouts, and I'm not a huge fan of celery, but with this recipe, I believe not everything is necessary." Not really listening, I just said,  
"Okay Sheldon." So we worked together; I prepared the vegetables, and Sheldon did the noodles. Since he finished the noodles before I finished my work, he heated the fry-pan too. When I finished the vegetables, I was going to put them straight into the pan, and I did. Sheldon had the spoon, so he stirred. I turned to get the rest of the veggies, when I felt something hit my back. So I turned around, and sure enough, Sheldon had the spoon in his hand, in the position he had finished in after throwing the food. He had a grin on his face, so I turned around and picked up the left over veggies. He had known it was coming, I thought, and I threw it. He threw some back, and I squealed. We kept going for ages, and whatever was going to be my dinner was all over my kitchen, but of course, it was going to end. I heard a knock at the door, but Sheldon threw more food at me, and I squealed again. The door opened and Leonard walked in. Damn him, could his timing be any worse, I was actually having fun. Sheldon and I stopped. "Oh, I, uh, didn't I was interrupting, I heard squealing and, yeah, umm… well, dinner's here," and he left. "Sheldon, thanks," I said.

"For what? You're apartment is a mess again," he shook his head.

"Thanks for today, I had fun," I said. It was silent for a moment and then we both left for apartment 4A for dinner.

**AN-Remember to review! And while you're reading, I have a question, what FF should I write next? I'm thinking either a Leonard/Penny or Sheldon/Amy, what do you think? **

**Hope you like it! Oh, and the recipe is actually a real recipe; I learnt it in Home ec. at school.**


	7. The Protective Material Cluster

**AN-Sorry it took so long to review! I was REALLY stuck for ideas, so if you have any suggestions, let me know! :P**

**Disclaimer-I don't own Big Bang Theory or any of the characters. **

SPOV

I never thought I'd see the day when Penny would leave, but I was standing at the front of her apartment while Leonard, Howard and Raj helped her tightly pack boxes with protective material and lift her furniture into the elevator, which is finally working again, although I have not used it. During the time it was out of use, I developed a strong liking to the stairs, and it would ruin my routine to start using the elevator, for instance, what would I do with the extra minute or so that I saved by using the elevator? But I snapped out of that dreaded thought as my friends, and Howard, came out of the elevator to get more of Penny's furniture. "Sheldon, you know people would like you at lot more if you helped out," Howard said. I looked at him,

"Really?" I asked, and pondered, "well that would explain a lot… alright," I said as I thought back to all the times I had stood and watched as everyone moved the desks around the classroom, or tried to catch the class pet to put into its cage. I picked up a lamp and walked over to Penny. "Penny, where should I put this?" I asked.

"Oh, Sheldon, you don't need to help," she said.

"No, Penny, you are my friend and a part of the social convention is to help when it is needed," I explained slowly to allow for Penny's less capable mind to understand what I was saying. "Sweetie, I don't think we needed help," she smiled as we looked around the room, which was now empty. "Oh well then I guess you can take this," I said quickly as I handed her the lamp and turned to leave.

"Wait, Sheldon, why are you giving me this? You can take it down to the car," she told me with a confused expression. I turned back and took the lamp. "I thought I didn't need to help!" I whined, which earned me a smile. I started walking out of the empty apartment with the lamp when I heard sobs. I turned around and saw Penny crying. "Penny?" I asked cautiously.

"Yes Sheldon?" she asked angrily.

"Are you okay?" I asked gently.

"I'm just sad I'm leaving," she said while still sobbing.

"Penny, I'm confused. I thought you were excited about leaving," I said confusedly.

"Yes Sheldon, but I'm going to miss you all, but probably you most of all,' she admitted sheepishly.

'Oh, well not to worry, we can always skype, and when I win the Nobel Prize, you can come to visit me." She laughed at this. "I'll miss you to Moon-Pie," she whispered. Again I was confused, I hadn't said I'd miss her, but I didn't point this out. "Penny, no one calls me Moon-Pie but Mee-maw."

"I know Shelly," she said teasingly as she reached up and kissed me on the cheek. I didn't "wipe it off" as the saying goes, instead I walked her down the stairs one last time, and remembered all the times we had done this. I couldn't believe she was actually leaving, but at least I'd see her on the new season of Star Trek, which I'd watch even if it turns out to be an insult to Star Trek, because it has Penny in it.

**AN-How was it? I was really stuck for ideas, but I remembered the title of a Taylor Swift song, which inspired this fanfic. Last Kiss, is the name of the song. **

**Also, I might put a poll up about my next fanfic, so keep an eye on my profile, or review with the next pairing you want me to write. **

**I'd also like to take this chance to send all of my best wishes and hope to Queensland. The floods are absolutely devastating, and to think they could go on until winter! :(**


	8. The Heart Discovery

**AN-So, the poll is now on my profile, sorry it took a while, but I accidently didn't click "yes" to show it on my profile. Also, this one-shot isn't my best idea ever, but I was bored and felt I needed to write a new chapter.**

**Disclaimer-I do not own Big Bang Theory.**

LPOV

Sheldon was rambling on about some inane topic, as usual, and, also as usual, everyone was pretending to listen. "so, Penny, can you see why you can't get a job in acting?" I heard him say. I turned my head and listened in to their conversation, "yes, Sheldon, I can't get a job in acting because I'm short, hook-up with heaps of guys and I need to serve you at the Cheesecake Factory every Tuesday night," she repeated in sarcastic tone. I rolled my eyes and returned to eating my Chinese. "Leonard? You agree with me right? Penny can't get an acting job because she has to serve me my burger on Tuesday night!"

"What?" I asked as I turned around and faced Sheldon and Penny, who were both staring at me, "oh, no! Sheldon, Penny can quit working at the Cheesecake Factory if she wants," Penny looked at Sheldon triumphantly. "I suppose, but Penny, before you leave, make sure to tell everyone to not touch my food," he said. "Yes, because if anyone should touch his food, we'll be hearing about it for months afterwards," Howard contributed sarcastically. "Oh, I'll tell'em alright," Penny warned.

"You know, on second thoughts Penny, maybe you shouldn't quit working at the Cheesecake Factory," I said quickly, "I mean, Bernadette can't handle it all by herself."

"Leonard, junior rodeo, remember?" she warned me. I turned away and finished eating my dinner.

The rest of the night was uneventful, save for the argument that Penny and Sheldon got into over a small cough from Penny. It was enough to make me leave with Raj and Howard for the comic-book store for an hour, even though none of us actually needed any new comic-books; we just stole Sheldon's when he wasn't around. In fact the only reason we bought comic-books was to keep Sheldon to realise what we did, that and the fact that Sheldon wasn't always not-around to supply our comic-books.

SPOV

"Penny‽ Was that a cough?" I asked as I got up and evacuated to the kitchen. I saw her roll her eyes.

"No Sheldon, I just faked a cough to get you to move." Her eyes twinkled deviously, and I stood up a little straighter. Then I realised who I was dealing with… Penny, Queen of Sarcasm. "Sarcasm?" I asked.

"No, Sheldon, it was fake," she replied. I calmed down slightly.

"Oh, well, in that case, I request that you move and allow me to sit down," I said as I moved forward and stood at my spot. "Nope," she said. I rolled my head,

"Penny, you have known me for over 1 year now, and you know that, that is my spot," I said with slight anger. She coughed, and I hurried back to the kitchen. "Penny, I know you like to annoy me, but this is just mean," I said. I saw Leonard, Raj and Howard exit the room through the front door.

"Sheldon, I didn't fake that one," she said, and it seemed genuine.

"Well then…goodbye," I pointed to the door, but she smiled.

"Ha! And you said I couldn't get a job in acting!" I shook my head,

"Penny, just because you are able to lie, does not necessarily mean you can act," I pointed out.

"Yes, but the thing is, I haven't been faking it. I was at work the other day and this family I served was sick. I think I've caught their colds." I gasped.

"Penny! I insist you leave this instant! I will not get sick! Goodbye!" I rushed. I saw she wasn't going to get up, so I picked up a broom, and poked her until she got up. "Wait, Sheldon. You owe me one; can you get me some soup?" I thought back to the time I was sick and Penny had looked after me. I sighed,

"No Penny, the great mind of Sheldon Cooper has better things to do." She looked at me expectantly, I sighed again. "Penny, you can make your own soup."

"Fine then, but you can at least sing me Soft Kitty. I hate singing it to myself when I'm sick." This actually surprised me. She sings Soft Kitty. "Fine Penny, I will sing you Soft Kitty, but after that you're on your own."

LPOV

I walked up the stairs to the apartment alone; both Raj and Howard had gone home. I figured Penny would be in her apartment, so I stopped there before going back to my apartment. I opened the door silently, and walked in. I heard Sheldon's voice coming from her bedroom, and he was… singing? "Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr." He sung quickly in a strained voice. I still hadn't moved when he walked out of her room. "Oh, Leonard, thank goodness. Penny's sick and I need your help in making sure I find out if I have any symptoms," he whispered.

"No, Sheldon. I'm still trying to figure out what the hell that was," I whispered back.

"Oh, too bad, because if I get sick, I'm going to need you to help me recover," he said before rushing out the room. I slowly followed him, still dazed by the fact that I had just made the discovery of the century… Sheldon Cooper has a heart!

**AN-So tell me, how was this one? I used a different set-up for this one because I thought it would make it a bit more interesting, longer and it would tell the story better. Remember to review! Constructive criticism, feedback, and suggestions all welcome! Also, remember to vote on the poll, which is actually on my profile now! Oh, and if you think any of these could make it as a separate fanfic, let me know and I'll consider extending it!**


	9. The MarioSpaghetti Confession

**AN-A big shout-out to stock2007! You've been really supportive and I doubt I would've gotten this far without you! Also, I think the last one was probably an S/P with a hint of L/P, but I guess it's up to how you interpret it. **

**Disclaimer- I do not own Big Bang Theory.**

PPOV

Walking into the lobby that night, I was in an exceptionally happy mood, even when I saw Sheldon sitting on the bottom step. "Hey there Shelly!" I said happily. I saw him click a button on the keypad of his laptop and look up at me. "Hello, Penny. You seem to be in a good mood," he noted, "did they reduce the number of meals served at the Cheesecake Factory so that less capable minds like yours could remember them?" He smiled and "laughed" at his joke, however, that spoiled my mood a little. "Actually, they did," I admitted. He clicked another button on his computer as he smiled. I looked over his shoulder, "so, Leonard's got another date with Leslie?" I asked as Mario jumped on top of one of those brown mushroomy things. He clicked the space bar, which obviously paused the game, and looked at me again. "Yes," he sighed, "I was waiting for you to return from your menial job, so that I could request sanctuary in your apartment for the time being," he said. I inhaled slowly, and, seeing that I was in a good mood, I said he could stay in my apartment until the date was over. As we walked up the stairs, I said "I was going to make spaghetti anyway." I saw another smile on Sheldon's face. I wouldn't tell him, but ever since that time when he locked himself out of his apartment and we ate spaghetti, I made it every week.

Only fifteen minutes later did I realise what a mistake I had made. All Sheldon did was play on his little computer, and I had half a mind to go over to apartment 4A and demand Leonard take him back… plus I secretly wanted him to get rid of Leslie, but I didn't; instead, I sat next to Sheldon and watched him play his game. Funnily enough, I discovered that I liked him better when he was actually being annoying, at least it gave me something to do, but this was fine to. Eventually, I almost fell asleep on his shoulder, and all that stopped me from doing so was Sheldon. "Penny, I would appreciate it if you would, first, not fall asleep, and, second and more importantly, not fall asleep on my shoulder," he said. I sat up sleepily, "oh, right. Sorry Moon-Pie," I joked. He played his game a little while longer, and I nearly fell asleep again, but he woke me up again, with a warning look in his eye. "Penny, perhaps it would help if you did something," he said as he handed me his laptop. Realising he wanted me to play it, I took it from him. I had watched him enough to know how to play it, and I was determined to beat him at it, so I played for about an hour, while Sheldon left me alone and got the spaghetti I had cooked a little while earlier. So when I had finally accepted the fact that I wouldn't beat Sheldon at Mario, I closed the laptop and ate my spaghetti with him. "So…" I said awkwardly,

"Penny, you know I don't do small talk," he interrupted.

"Oh, right," I said,

"However, since It's the social convention… what did they take off the menu?" he asked. I was a little confused by his question, but then I remembered our earlier conversation, and smiled. "Well," I started, "they took off the-"

"You know, I just realised what a horrible mistake I made, I honestly don't care," he said. I didn't respond, so we ate in silence.

The rest of the night was really just like any other night. We talked, which escalated into a debate, which, of course, Sheldon won. We watched some TV, well, I watched, Sheldon cleaned, because apparently my choice of channel was "an indication of how feeble your mind is, and your apartment is, again, a dump" according to the whack-a-doodle. We also snuck over the apartment 4A to see if the date was nearly over, unfortunately, it wasn't, so Sheldon was still staying with me, in my apartment.

It was 10:00 at night, and the date still wasn't finished, well, at least Leslie hadn't left, which led me to believe Sheldon would be, again, be staying at my place, especially since he had let himself into my room, and fallen asleep in my bed. He claimed he had already stayed up too late, and he was too tall or the couch. I made a mental note to get a bigger one for times like this, and another note to kill Sheldon one day, which would save me from buying a bugger couch all together. I also couldn't help but think that if I got back together with Leonard, Sheldon wouldn't have to come over. I couldn't decide if I should go with the second or third idea, and decided I'd do both…or maybe just the third, because, even though he's psychotic, he is my friend.

That night, I dreamed of Mario, cheesecake, Sheldon and, of course, SHOES!

**AN-Okay, so I have a few things to say, so stay with me. First, how was it? Please review! It will only take a few seconds and it helps me a lot! Even if it's criticism or one word, I realy appreciate it. It makes me feel like I've made an… impact?**

**Second, please vote on the poll which can be found on my profile. If you have any suggestions for other couples, PM me or review this fanfic. If you can't find it, PM me and I'll try to help, or just review this with your choice. **

**Thirdly, I'm really running out of ideas for this, so if you have any, let me know. Otherwise, I'm not sure how long this will keep going. **

**Lastly, if you think any of these one-shots could make it as a separate fic, let me know and I'll consider adding to it. **

**Thank you immensely,**

**Maddy46**


	10. The Laundry Night Hypothesis

_AN-I have actually discovered that Penny's eyes seem to be more brown than green. As I was curious, I went to the BBT wikia and found the picture of Penny. Then I put it into Paint and used the colour picker. Yep, turns out they're brown… or at least that's how they are in the picture. If anyone has any reason to disagree, let me know, because I really am curious._

_Also, this one will be a longer chapter, I promise. I won't stop until it's at least three pages!_

_Disclaimer-I don't own Big Bang Theory._

Saturday was laundry night. Every week at 8:15. It was his time, alone, without having to put up with Leonard and his banal chit-chat about this, that and Penny. Between his futile daydreams about Penny, Howard's incessant droning about women, and Raj's drinking, he was more than happy to escape downstairs to do the laundry. More recently, he discovered that Penny, his exceedingly messy neighbour, also did her laundry on Saturday at 8:15, although hardly correct. Her detergent to clothing ratio was exceptionally off, she didn't wash according to the colours of the clothing, and she didn't pre-wash _or_ pre-soak. Most importantly, she didn't fold and organize her clothes once they were washed, and she used the time to convince him to do things he didn't want to do!

He always looked forward to Saturday night, but it used to be because he liked the solitude. If he was being honest with himself, he now looked forward to Saturday night because it was the one night that he and Penny spent together. Alone together - he always did like a good oxymoron. Although Penny was far less organised and often turned up closer to 8:20, they spent a substantial amount of time together, often talking about prosaic issues, which they often ended up solving. Often things would turn out good at the end of the night, but on occasions, that didn't happen.

Sheldon walked down the stairs on Saturday night at 8:15. I knew this because a) it happened every week and b) I was keeping an eye out for him. Since I wasn't sure if my clock was right after it had stopped working a few weeks ago, I used Sheldon as my clock. His routine was exact, and, when I couldn't be bothered finding my phone, or I had no idea where it was, I just checked what Sheldon was doing, and I knew what I should be doing. Plus, it gave me a good excuse to watch him.

Truth be known, there was a small spark that first day, I just didn't want to say anything before I got to know the two guys. It's a good thing I did, because I quickly discovered that Sheldon didn't date, or touch, or, in general, care; but I don't believe that, not entirely. I believe that he does, he just expresses it differently. For instance, he did lend me money when I needed it. After I knew he wasn't interested, I still liked him, but I didn't do anything about it. Except that I paid more attention to him. I even memorised the reason why he sat on the left-hand side of the couch! I sang Soft Kitty to him when he was sick, and I even called him sweetie!

I got my laundry and headed down as well. I always arrived about five minutes after Sheldon. It was my routine. I'd head down late, chuck my laundry into a machine, and then we'd talk until we were done. I even waited for him to finish his weird folding.

As Sheldon descended the stairs to the laundry, he wondered if Penny would be joining him. He knew she wouldn't be there early, she never was, but he also knew that she would join him. She always did, it was their, as today's slang goes, "thing".

When he got to the laundry, he began loading his washing into the machine, and measured out the exact amount of detergent. Penny then entered the room, and took the machine next to his. "Hey Sheldon!" she said sweetly. He looked up momentarily.

"Hello Penny," he replied nonchalantly, he looked back down, before quickly looking back up, "Penny, I assume you are just going to 'dump your clothes' into the machine, but I am requesting of you to sort them into colour groups and use the correct amount of detergent."

"Sure thing Sheldon," she said with a quick nod. She opened the machine next to Sheldon's, as usual, and dumped her clothes and some detergent into it. She saw Sheldon's face contort with derision as he shook his head. It was a look she had always, secretly, loved on Sheldon's face. "Penny, Penny, Penny," he said. She pretended not to hear him, even though she had heard every word, and seen every emotion flicker across his face. They stood in silence for a little while, before Penny broke it. "So I watched the Star Wars movies, and I'm not sure I fully understand them." Sheldon almost laughed.

"I'm not surprised. You lack an attention span that allows you to focus wholly on something that takes longer than shopping for shoes online."

"Yeah, well, anyway, I was wondering if you would, I don't know, maybe watch them with me?" Penny wasn't exactly lying. She really hadn't fully understood them, but what she was really asking was If Sheldon would spend some time with her. If she had asked anyone else, they would've asked if it was a date, but that was where Sheldon's complete and utter lack of social skills played to her advantage. "Penny, if I may ask, but when would this take place?" She sighed.

"Oh, I don't know Sheldon. Just sometime you're free." He was so difficult sometimes!

"Oh, well okay then," he paused momentarily, "I'm free now." This startled Penny slightly, but she wouldn't let him see that. "Well okay then. You just finish up your laundry and then we'll get started."

"Penny. Once I have 'finished up' I must first take my laundry to my apartment and put them away into their allotted places." Penny just nodded, and said, a tad sarcastically,

"Fine, Sheldon. You can put your laundry away first." Sheldon just nodded and Penny swore she saw a smile, and not a creepy Joker smile.

As Sheldon folded his washing, Penny threw hers into the basket. Sheldon used _Kolinahr _to stop himself from taking Penny's washing and folding it himself. As they walked up the stairs, Sheldon reminded himself of what happened throughout the Star Wars saga, not that he needed reminding. He had an eidetic memory, as well as a love for Star Wars, though not as strong as his love for Star Trek, which contributed to his exact memory of the Star Wars saga and its entirety.

Once Sheldon had organised his laundry, he told Leonard, Howard and Raj that he was going to watch Star Wars with Penny. "I'm going over to Penny's apartment to help her try to understand the Star Wars saga," he said. The guys barely flinched.

"Whatever," was Leonard's response. This shocked Sheldon. Leonard was infatuated with Penny, yet he didn't even move at the chance to spend time with her, perhaps he wasn't as close to understanding the social construct as he had thought. Instead of replying, he simply walked out the door to Penny's apartment. _Knock, knock, knock, _"Penny."_ Knock, knock, knock, _"Penny."_ Knock, knock, knock _"Penny."

"I hope he chokes on his popcorn," said Raj.

"We all do," said Howard, "except maybe Penny." This caught Leonard's attention.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Well it's just a hunch, but I'd say Penny's got a thing for Sheldon, if you know what I mean," he said as he leaned forward. "What, no! That's ridiculous!" Leonard exclaimed.

"I don't know. They're always spending time together, and she always acts a little different around Sheldon," Raj added. Leonard, who was getting more and more jealous by the second, interjected. "That's because she hates him."

"I don't know dude, love and hate are very similar, and often easy to mistake for one another."

"Oh cut it with the Twilight lessons," Howard said. Leonard didn't hear half of the argument Raj and Howard were having, he was too caught up in his jealousy and his plan to determine if Penny did have a thing for his room-mate.

_AN- So I started this off as a one-shot, but as I got further into it, it got more and more interesting for me to write, and I might make it a separate fic. So tell me what you think, but I'm pretty sure it'll come out of The SheldonPenny Paradox and turn into its own fic. Also, a poll update. Sheldon/Penny is winning with only one vote, so please look and vote, or just review with your choice (it doesn't have to be one on the poll). Oh, and please review! It took me a few days to write this, and I put a lot of effort into it, so I'd appreciate it if you read it, review it. Constructive criticism, ideas and plain feedback all welcome!_


	11. Shy Boy

_AN- Okay, so, this is my response to my Shy Boy Challenge. Enjoy!_

_Disclaimer- I don't own Big Bang Theory, or Jordin Sparks._

I walk into apartment 4A, and am immediately greeted by Howard. He does it every time, greets, which actually means hit on me, in some creepy way. "Howard, I'm sick and tired of you doing that. It's never gonna happen, so don't even bother." I warned, and watched his face fall slightly.

…

I'm sitting on the couch, in my spot, when Leonard winked at me. I got the feeling I had missed a conversation, but I didn't care. Leonard had been trying some horrid new look lately-I think it was bad-boy. He walked around trying to look tough, and he wore some biker-y clothes. It took all of my focus not to throw an egg at him. I've dated more than my fair share of bad-boys, and I sure as hell wasn't going to date a fake one, especially when I'm sick of him trying to make a move on me.

…

Sheldon walked into the room. I immediately looked up, watching him as he sat down next to me. I never noticed how much poise he actually possessed. I still watched him from the corner of my eye as we ate. Howard, Raj and Leonard were looking at me, and I felt like I was going to punch one of them, maybe Leonard, or Howard. Tonight, I might just need Sheldon, or at least they would. He was the only thing stopping me from hitting one of them now. Hopefully he'd stand in the way when I held my fist up, but then he wouldn't be the shy boy I had my eye on.

I was standing by the stage where I would be performing in a few hours, when I got a look from some guy with shades on… indoors. Clearly he didn't know how much I couldn't stand shades on indoors… unless there was a specific reason for it, which this guy rock-boy clearly didn't have. So many guys with shades have made a move on before, and I'm sick and tired of it. He walked up to me, I rasied my hand "Bye bye," I said.

…

After the performance, there was a party. Somehow, a guy I knew from Nebraska had ended up there, and he started dancing over to me. He tried to dance with me, but I just walked away, making a point of it. We had dated in high school, and when I had broken up with him, he had tried to get me back multiple times. I was tired of it, usually I let him down gently, but this was just one time too many.

…

I walked over to the buffet, where Sheldon was standing uncomfortably. I eyed him as I poured a drink for myself. He was so out of his comfort zone, and with my confidence, nerves and anger at everyone hitting on me, I decided I needed him. I grabbed his wrist and dragged him over to dance. He looked so shy, but he loosened up a little, and (tried) to dance. I laughed, and he looked at me, slightly angered, which just made me laugh more.

I've dated every type of boy out there. Freaks, crude, heck, even a "cowboy" before, who was really just a guy who was obsessed with Woody from Toy Story! But I'm from Nebraska, and I can knock people out like little kids. At the moment, thought, I only wanted Sheldon.

_AN- Okay, there it is! Also, just a few "notes". First of all, I'm taking down the poll on my profile soon, so vote on it! Secondly, check out my forum "The Shamy". That's all! Except remember to review, and if you liked this, check out The Laundry Night Hypothesis. Also, again, if you want to collab on a Shamy or Leonard/Penny fic, review of PM me!_


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